Temporary Emotion.

Now I understand where it all went wrong, where I actually fucked it up.

When I was with you, I was totally blinded by the temporary emotions I got

And could bearly understand the actual situation,

I thought I was going in the right lane and you’re always my destiny but not for you,

To you, I was just a temporary person, a passing cloud.

But fuck me for thinking you are my everything,

Fuck me for giving you all of my best just to satisfy you and see you smile.

I broke every of my rule to see that smile on your face,

The smile that got me down on my knees in the first place.

And I’m still on my knees but for a totally different reason.

Now I feel like someone just snatched away the best thing I could ever have from me.

And some kind of a halo in my heart,

But this is all temporary too, right?

Wrong.

Pain is temporary but the cause of the pain is permanent.

And if the cause is something you loved too much, that’s one hell of a thing.

-k-

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Peace.

I always have this constant fight for peace and happiness,

But that’s something I could never win for myself.

So I try to find peace and happiness in silence.

I go to the beach every time I feel sad or when I’m in pain,

Cuz unlike human beach never gives me advice about the things I do,

And most importantly, she listens.

She listens to everything I say even though most of it just doesn’t make sense.

And she talks back,

She talks about that couple who used to spend hours in the beach and looked like nothing can break what they have. But parted for a small reason.

She talks about kids building castles made of sand and how they cry when the castle falls apart.

She talks about those people who laugh jumping in the water and live carefree.

She told me about the families that visit her every week and spend time with her.

She talks about those shy skinny lovers.

She talks about that heartbroken fragile teenager who just sits in silence.

Pain.

It is always there,

To keep me up and alive.

Maybe the edge lining of my heart is made up of it.

I keep thinking, trying to leave it behind.

But I keep reminding myself about the void, the empty space and the still emotions in my heart.

You can’t forget about something that you keep thinking about.

All the alternatives that I tried to put in to fill the void, they failed. I failed.

They couldn’t even leave little mark while you you left big scars.

Everything will be back to normal they say.

The scars will fade,

The tears will slowly stop,

You’re thoughts will be clear again,

And you’ll start to move on In life,

That’s what they say.

But I say,

The scars may fade but the marks will stay,

The tears will stop but the emotions will stay,

The thoughts will be clear but the little questions will stay.

And yeah you will move on in life but the lane you crossed will always be there.

After all past is a lesson and pain is the teacher.

-k-

Hangover.

It started out so fine and beautiful.

We were each other’s drug,

The kind of drug that I knew will kill me at some point.

But I was fine with that.

I was addicted to you.

I thought I could deal with the after math.

But now I’m in the hangover.

Every girl looks like you, sounds like you.

But nobody can be My You.

I keep thinking about how much I want you back.

How much I need you.

I can see the spaces between us.

There is a lot of stuff going on.

It’s hard for me to look at your pictures, remind myself everything we did.

I can’t be okay about the fact that we’ll never do that again.

But that’s what life is.

That’s what love is.

It comes in slow and goes out fast.

-k-

Let It Be.

Time revolves,

Around us, into us.

Space is created,

Every second, in every atom.

Sounds come out,

From a rain drop that’s louder than bombs.

When you think, you analyse,

And when you analyse, you realise.

Let the time sync inside you,

Let the space of your mind grow,

Let the sound of your heart be heard,

Until then, Let it be.

-k-

A Smile, A Touch, A Kiss.

It was something I never felt before or would feel again.

The way she looked into my eyes got me into a zone of ecstasy

I still remember the touch of her fingers with nail finely polished in blue.

As we got closer I could feel our hearts sync into the beat.

The moment her lips touched mine, I swear I felt the milkyway touch my feet.

My mind could think nothing.

My heart kept skipping beats.

I kept wanting more of it.

Now when I think of it,

I think how A Smile could make me fall in love,

How A Touch could make numb,

And A Kiss could make me feel the eternity.

-K-

Only Girl.

Whatever it was,

Whatever you wanted it to be,

Whatever I felt.

The warmth, sweetness, sharp pain and a little lust.

All together brought us close,

It was Love darling,

That kind of love where I know I’ll lose you soon but I was so distracted by your eyes.

I couldn’t think of anything else but your voice.

All I needed was your smile to keep me alive.

It was all your magic,

A spell that you casted on me.

Never knew it’ll hurt this much,

But I’m still a believer of your whispers,

Your voice is still my favourite song, that I’d listen forever and on.

But since you left there’s nothing left in me,

All I feel is empty.

I bewail I couldn’t make you mine.

You’re still the only one,

You’re still my only girl.

-k-

Nirvana.

Release him

Into the sky

Out of the cage

Break those gates

Don’t think twice

Let his wings

Dlaze into emptiness

Shallow blue skies

Set him free

For fuck sake

Let him fly

His own way, far away

Let him get lost

And wander

In the forests

Around the seas

He’ll return

When it’s time

To come by

Until then, please

Let him fly.

-K-

The Fallen Poet.

I write poems

on the fallen leaves

of a tree.

I sing song

with a mellow voice

and care free.

I live on a shore

and sold my soul

to the beach.

I love a girl

for her smile and

her bright eyes.

I sit alone

in a nice small city,

in a corner seat at movies.

I’m not a writer,

I’m not a poet,

I’m a fallen boy

with weird dreams.

-K-

Once In A Lifetime.

You were my epitome

My definition of heartbreak.

The purest form of love

I used feel my soul sync into yours

Maybe that’s why we were called “soulmates”

But now your eyes speak a different truth.

The truth where I’m not totally yours,

Where I’m partially a ghost.

I miss the warmth of your heart and the sweetness of your lips.

Now all I see is pain,

A struggle to look into your eyes.

Now we are two different souls with same beat.

All I think is,

Once in a lifetime,

You were mine.

-K-